nampaknya aku je yg masih aktif berbelog. hai dunia maya. hai.

as of tonight, i'm preparing myself to take a huge step. one i've never thought i'd ever do. i am imagining so many scenarios that would happen afterwards, particularly ones which wouldn't go as what i'm imagining now.

i've been considering for about a month now. life on the other side, without such stability i'm having now seems unfavorable. most of which people would told me to hold on first, don't do it, just keep on doing what i do.

and for me, i'm not doing it because i loathe what i do. the thing which have made peace with myself long ago. this thing, the thing i'm going to do, would perhaps be because i think what's missing in my life would be the things i have now. rather irony.

and if i don't do it now, or if i don't ever do it, i perhaps might not learn the lessons i'm going to learn soon. it could've been the people around me are right. i shall not do it and shouldn't ever think about it. but there's also a chance that they are tad wrong. either way, the one that'd do it is me.

so here's me, choosing.

pray for me. may Allah return the favors back to you.